Brushing Off the Ol’ Resume

Many articles were recently published online and in the newspapers to help people deal with the down economy. Some of these articles talked about how to improve someone’s interview skills or how to dress for success in the workplace. I imagined a few weeks ago that a friend might ask for my help in reviewing his or her resume but I had no idea that I would review my Sweetie’s resume.

I’m not sure how useful my critique of his resume would be but he insisted that I look at it. Before I show you excerpt of his resume, here is a comparison of our skill sets:

Sweetie:
He is a computer programmer who knows many applications and computer languages. He has over 17 years of experience in his field and he’s worked for a few big name companies. He has experience developing web based applications as well as managing people. He tried to explain to his frizzy hair girlfriend that he installed a virtual computer on his computer…oh…head still hurts…ouch…

Me:
I am a former music teacher who realized I would go crazy if I attempted to teach children how to play the kazoo every day for the rest of my life. In an effort to find a different (and saner) job, I took some business classes at the local college. I did take an Information System class but my experience is limited on this subject because my IS professor insisted on discussing his erectile dysfunction due to prostate surgery with the class. My work history includes several odd jobs before landing my current job where I sit at a desk all day and try to be useful.

As you can tell, there is a slight difference in our work experience and knowledge base. When my Sweetie gave me a copy of his resume to review, I quickly reviewed his educational background. This is what I read (or this is what I was able to read):

1. ASP.NET
2. Something
3. Something
4. Blah
5. C+++++++++
6. Something else I can’t remember
   
   

I was pretty sure that he spelled “Blah” correctly so I moved on to his work experience:

Sweetie worked at a company from 1992 to 1995
He did blah, blah, blah, something, something blah

Sweetie worked at a different company from 1995 to 2001
He did blah, blah, blah, something, something blah

I learned two things on this day. I learned that I should trust some of my English skills (my spelling skills to be precise). I also learned that my Sweetie does stuff with things.