Random Thoughts II

I’m not really a person who sees the glass as half full or half empty because the damn thing is missing!

Do you get a free box of Pop Tarts with every presidential pardon?

The television show Sober Living probably does make an excellent drinking game but I’m having trouble trying to figure out the rules. Here’s what I have so far:
Take a sip every time someone swears.
Take a drink if someone hugs another person.
Take two drinks if someone cries.
Take a big swig if heroin is found.
Finish drink if public service commercial about addiction airs.

Economic Stimulus Package would probably be a great name for a sex toy.

After I die, I hope that I look as good as Orville Redenbacher. For a dead guy, he looked great in the commercials that aired over the holiday season.